


Ronnie the Rat & Dirtgrub: The Start of It All

by Masterofkarate



Category: It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
Genre: Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Best Friends, Body Image, Bullying, Childhood Friends, Childhood Trauma, Friendship, Gen, Implied Childhood Sexual Abuse, Implied/Referenced Incest, Internalized Homophobia, May be some child neglect/abusive behaviord implied, Mild Language, Mind/Mood Altering Substances, Recreational Drug Use, Substance Abuse, also may have some minor romantic tension bc whatever, smoking weed, specific tags at the start of each chapter, this is abt mac & charlie's childhood so there will be many sad parts
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-08-07
Updated: 2019-05-26
Packaged: 2019-06-23 06:12:01
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con, Underage
Chapters: 5
Words: 8,024
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15600045
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Masterofkarate/pseuds/Masterofkarate
Summary: Just a collection of Charlie/Mac childhood one shots.





	1. Breakfast at Mac's

**Author's Note:**

> So some heavily implied incest/csa at the start of this chapter, as well as alcoholic parents (and a ment of children consuming alcohol).
> 
> Please be safe and smart when deciding to read.

Charlie used to love sleep. Usually, the morning came way too soon for him. This past week, the morning seemed to be coming later and later. He had not been sleeping much at all. Most days since his uncle moved in, he fell asleep around three or four in the morning. Last night, he didn't fall asleep at all. He laid in bed, still as could be, and stared at the ceiling.

When the sun came out, he squeezed his eyes shut. Maybe he could get a little bit of sleep in. He could not. Even with his eyes squeezed shut, he was awake. His uncle's alarm blaring at 6 in the morning was a godsend.

He shot out of bed almost immediately. Thankfully, Uncle Jack groggily hit the snooze button. He decided he wasn't going to shower today. He didn't want to. Showers weren't helping him feel clean anymore. He didn't even want to change. He wore sweatpants and a t-shirt to bed last night, so it was a somewhat passable outfit.

He ran to his mom’s room. He wanted to leave before his uncle’s second alarm, but he had to say goodbye to his mom. She'd freak out if he didn't, maybe even have the cops look for him.

He walked in and the room was hit with the scent of vodka. Mac told him that’s what it was. Mac’s parents drank beer, but when they were trying to celebrate, they had vodka. Charlie's mom only drank vodka. Mac knew all about this stuff. They had once stole vodka from Mrs. Kelly. Neither of them liked it one bit. Mac said they couldn't get away with stealing beer, but they did sometimes drink whatever was left over when they passed out. Charlie liked it better than vodka, but not by much. Mac said he liked it a lot.

Anyway, the smell wasn't shocking, but it made Charlie’s stomach hurt. He could almost feel the burn going down his throat from the time he and Mac stole some.

He took in a deep breath of the hallway air before running to his mom’s bed. She was in a deep sleep, sprawled out and snoring slightly.

Charlie poked her arm. No movement. He poked it again, and she turned to her side, facing away from Charlie. He put his hand on her shoulder and shook gently, the way she woke him before Uncle Jack moved in. 

“Mom,” he whispered. “Mom, I'm leaving.”

With a yawn, she turned to face him. Her eyes were barely open, but as soon as she saw Charlie, she smiled sleepily.

“Mom, I'm leaving.” he said again.

“Good morning, Charlie,” she whispered. She reached out and cupped his face. He didn't want to be touched at all, but he didn't want to hurt her feelings so he stood there.

“Morning,” he mumbled. “I'm going to school.”

She glanced at the clock and rubbed her eyes, “It's so early, Charlie. You need to have breakfast.”

“Oh, um,” he glanced at the clock. Only a minute or two before the second alarm went off. “Mrs. Mac invited me to breakfast over there.”

“That's sweet,” she hummed. She pulled her hand away and sat up. “Invite Mac over to dinner one night this week, okay sweetie?”

“Yeah, mom. Can I go now?” he asked, shifting his weight from foot to foot.

“Of course,” she answered, before pulling him in for a hug. She kissed his head and said, “I love you so much, Charlie.”

“Love you too,” he answered before wiggling out of the embrace. 

He quickly left the room and hurried down the stairs. When he made it to the landing, he heard the alarm start to blare. His heart started racing. Without a thought, he started running. When he was out of the house, he kept running. He ran all three blocks until he was at Mac’s house. 

It wasn't until he got to Mac’s house that he realized several flaws in his plan. First, he forgot to put on shoes. He was so focused on running that he didn't notice. Second, he also forgot his school bag. Third, Mac and Mac’s family were not expecting him. 

Maybe he could sit outside Mac’s house and wait, but he didn't want to be a weirdo. Mac was his only friend, making Mac hate him sounded like a bad idea. Plus, maybe he could borrow shoes from Mac.

After a few minutes of debate, he walked up the porch and knocked on the door. No answer. He knocked again, a little harder. He thought about ringing the doorbell, but if Mr or Mrs Mac was asleep, everybody would be mad at him for waking them up, including Mac.

He was about to knock again when the door opened. Mac was standing there with a t-shirt too big for him and flannel pajama pants on. Charlie actually felt happy for the first time that day.

“Dude, you can't knock loud like that, my mom stopped snoring for a second, I thought she was gonna wake up,” Mac stage whispered, stepping aside to let Charlie in.

“Sorry,” Charlie stage whispered back.

“You look like shit, man,” Mac said, leading Charlie into the living room. They sat in front of the TV together, He-Man reruns were on.

Charlie shrugged and said, “Couldn't sleep last night.”

“Is it ‘cause of your uncle?” Mac asked. “I don't get it man, you sleep when we have sleepovers.”

“Yeah, but it's different,” Charlie whispered. He started to pick at a hole near the hem of his shirt.

“Yeah, he  _ is  _ annoying. And I'm awesome,” Mac reasoned.

“Exactly,” Charlie answered, happy that Mac made up a simple explanation on his own.

“Wait,” Mac said, looking at Charlie again. “Do you not have shoes?”

“Forgot ‘em,” Charlie answered.

“God, you're an idiot sometimes,” Mac laughed, but it was nice. He wasn't making fun of Charlie, he was teasing Charlie in the way that friends tease each other.

“Can I borrow some?” Charlie asked.

“My feet are bigger than yours, but sure,” Mac shrugged. “I'm gonna go take a shower and get dressed. I'll bring your shoes down when I'm done. You can get cereal while you wait.”

Charlie nodded as Mac left the room

He sat on the couch, half watching the TV. He finally felt safe and cared for. It was a good feeling. It was such a good feeling, that he fell asleep. He woke up to Mac gently shaking him awake, the way he shook his mom awake earlier that morning. Mac was now showered, with slicked back hair. He wore a black t-shirt and faded black jeans, as well knock off converse.

Charlie yawned and sat up. He saw two bowls of cereal on the coffee table and shoes in front of him on the floor. Mac joined him on the couch and they ate and talked and ate. He ate the whole bowl of cereal, it was the first meal he'd finished since Uncle Jack moved in.

The time for school came soon. Together, they started walking. Once they were a safe distance from the house, Charlie asked, “How come your parents don't wake up in the morning?”

“They trust I'm self sufficient,” Mac answered. “Dad works all night and mom stays up late to wait for dad.”

“Oh,” Charlie said. “What's your dad's job again?”

“He's an  _ entrepreneur _ ,” Mac answered, emphasising the word. “That means he takes care of business.”

“Oh neat,” Charlie answered.

“Yeah, he's totally kickass,” Mac answered proudly. “I'm gonna be just like him when I'm grown up.”

“You're already kickass,” Charlie answered genuinely. Mac was the coolest guy he knew.

“I am, aren't I?” Mac asked, puffing his chest out.

Charlie just laughed and shook his head fondly. School was in view now and that made Charlie sad. School sucked, not as bad as home right now, but it sucked. The teachers thought he was stupid, the other kids did too (but they were meaner about it). The only cool parts of the day were when he and Mac hung out by themselves.

They were less than a block away. Mac decided to bring it up now because for some reason it felt like it should be a secret, “Hey, man, if you can't fall asleep, you can stay over my house.”

“Really?” Charlie asked.

“Yeah, man. Like, if you're allowed, just come over after dinner and come in like normal. But if you're not allowed, just come over real late. You can climb up through the fire escape in the back alley. You know my window’s right there. Then, we'll sneak you out in the morning,” Mac told him.

“Thanks man,” Charlie said. That was so nice of Mac. He had a place he could sleep again, a place he could feel safe. Charlie didn't know how to tell him how much it meant, so he just said, “You're my best friend.”

“You're my best friend too, buddy” Mac answered.


	2. Charlie is Smart (Mac & Charlie get caught stealing)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mac usually gets to make all of the plans, because he's smarter than Charlie. That's just common knowledge. But Mac knows Charlie isn't stupid, and Charlie proves it when he gets the boys out of a jam that Mac got them into.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Specific warnings for this:
> 
> -there's like a REALLY racist paragraph in this, but like it just fit w/ the mentality that I'm sure the boys grew up with.  
> -depictions of poverty/growing up poor  
> -implied bullying but no depictions. also everybody thinks Charlie is stupid  
> -they go into the sewers so like there's a moment of implied nudity but i don't describe it @ all It's literally 1 sentence, i don't even think i say naked or undressed or anything  
> -also they huff glue but there's no depiction of being high

Charlie was not stupid. Mac was one of two people in the whole world who knew that, the other was Mrs. Kelly. Charlie didn't even believe it.

In all fairness, Mac never acknowledged that Charlie was smart. If Charlie knew he was smart, he wouldn't let Mac make all plans. If Mac didn't get to make all the plans, he'd lose the only time he got to feel in control of anything. At ten, he didn't quite understand the psychology behind it, though. He thought he was just a born leader.

Mac hated his damn leadership skills today. Charlie was whining about being hungry and Mac was hungry too. They both skipped out on lunch that day to huff glue in the bathroom. Skipping lunch was Mac’s plan (he didn't tell Charlie, but the real reason was because there had been a few guys picking on Charlie extra bad that day because he had a small episode in class when the teacher read his report aloud to belittle him. Mac wasn't afraid of anybody, he was a badass and good at fighting, but he thought maybe keeping low was a good idea today), huffing glue was Charlie’s.

Well, since they skipped lunch (and neither of them packed, they both got free lunch from the state), they hadn't eaten since their shared pack of poptarts before school. Since he was just as hungry as Charlie but neither of them wanted to go home, Mac led them into a corner store. Since neither of them had money, Mac suggested they steal.

Stealing was bad when you stole from people, but when you stole from stores, it was okay. Mac's mom had explained that greedy foreigners all moved to Philly to open up corner stores and charge the poor folks too much money for cigarettes and lottery tickets. Mac was pretty sure they charged too much for chips too. So, stealing was okay at the corner store.

When they walked in, everything was fine. It really was. The clerk didn't even look up at the kids. It was common for kids to come here after school to pick up some snacks or cheap toys at the counter on their way home.

Charlie was obviously nervous before. He pursed his lips and started blowing wet air, it sounded like he was blowing raspberries for no reason.

“What the hell are you doing?” Mac whispered when they got in an aisle filled with chips.

“Whistling casually, shut up, you'll blow my cover,” Charlie whispered back before continuing.

“Cut it out,” Mac said as he picked a pack of peanut butter TastyKake Kandy Kakes off of the shelf, shoving it into his pocket.

“Whatever man,” Charlie grumbled. He grabbed a bag of Herr’s ketchup chips and placed it between his tshirt and his hoodie. He then grabbed several bars of chocolate, shoving them into his pocket.

Mac grabbed several more pastries and then said, “Let's go.”

Charlie nodded and the two speed walked towards the door. With both of their hands shoved into their obviously filled pockets to keep everything in place, their heads down, and their quick pace, it was very obvious what they were doing.

They were two steps from the door when the man behind the counter spoke. With a staccato but booming voice, he said, “Hey! Kids! What do you have there?”

They both froze for a moment. Just a moment. They had already developed the ability to have conversations with each other without speaking. They made eye contact with each other, then glanced at the clerk and then at the door.

“I'm talking to-” the man behind the counter had started speaking again, but their silent conversation was over. They bolted out of the store.

The man jumped over the counter and started running after them, so they just ran faster. They ran and ran and ran. It was late November, but it almost felt like January. Although the two boys hand boundless energy, running in the cold weather filled their lungs up with harsh air. Charlie grabbed Mac’s hand, letting a few of the stolen goods fall from his pocket, and pulled Mac down an alleyway.

“Don’t- leave- a- trail,” Mac panted out, pausing between each word.

“Sorry,” Charlie mumbled. Their pace had slowed significantly after they had turned.

“Do you think he's still chasing us?” Mac asked. Usually, Charlie asked these kinds of questions, but Charlie was better at dealing with being in trouble than Mac was. Charlie was smart.

“Dunno,” Charlie said. He stopped suddenly, looking down at the ground. “I don't wanna find out, though. I know where we can hide out til later.”

“Where?” Mac asked quickly. Charlie didn't say anything, he just pointed. Immediately, Mac responded in disgust, “No way, dude! That's gross!”

“No it's not!” Charlie immediately protested. “The sewers are awesome! I hang out there all the time. It's quiet and there's nobody else and nobody will find us.”

“No. Way.” Mac said, using his hand to punctuate his words.

“C’mon, Mac. If this guy catches us, we're in deep shit.” Charlie urged. He sat in the ground, already letting his legs slip in through the opening between the grate and the pavement.

“Dude, get up!” Mac urged.

“If you get caught, you're on your own,” Charlie warned and then jumped down suddenly.

“Charlie!” Mac whined. And then suddenly he heard footsteps nearby. Not in the alley, but approaching. They were not the clerk’s footsteps (he was long gone), but Mac was sure they were. Without another thought, Mac jumped in.

“I knew you'd come in!” Charlie laughed, literally jumping with excitement. He loved the sewers. He only ever felt safe and at peace down here. He was happy to share it with his best (and only) friend.

“Whatever man, it wreaks. We're gonna get diseased,” Mac muttered. Charlie shook his head fondly and opened one of the few candy bars he had left. He held the candy bar with one hand and reached for Mac’s with his other.

Holding hands was “like totally gay” according to Mac, but they did it sometimes. Not at school, never at school. Not usually outside at all. Usually, they only held hands when they were in one of their houses. If they were trying to do homework and Charlie was getting frustrated, Mac would hold his hand. If they were at Mac’s house and Mac was upset (he was often upset at his house ever since his dad got arrested), Charlie would hold his hand. During sleepovers, sometimes they would hold hands in bed. Charlie wasn't big on physical affection and neither was Mac, but it was a gentle, secret touch of love between the two boys, who both had trouble expressing love. Charlie liked it a lot, so did Mac. Charlie wanted to explain to Mac he brought him down here because he loved him and wanted to share his secret place with him. Charlie knew how to say that without words. Charlie was smart.

After Charlie held his hand, Mac did calm down. They passed snacks back and forth (although Mac insisted they abandon the snacks after the first wave of water hit) and walked for blocks. There were a few occasions they had to hold their clothed up over their heads, and Mac was appalled at it. Still, Charlie enthusiastically told Mac about all of the good times he'd had in the sewers. Mac listened.

When the light from the streets above was getting dimmer, Charlie navigated them through the sewers until they were just two blocks from Mac’s house. Charlie was so smart that it impressed Mac sometimes. 

Charlie walked Mac home. When they got to Mac’s door, Mac said, “Thanks for like, you know, hiding us and stuff.”

“Eh, I didn't wanna get arrested,” Charlie shrugged. “Plus, I love the sewers.’

“Yeah, I won't be going back there anytime soon,” Mac laughed. He paused for a moment before quietly adding, “But it was a really good plan, Charlie. You're really smart.”

Charlie laughed at that and said, “No, dude. I'm the stupidest person ever.”

“You're not,” Mac answered firmly, not even a trace of a smile on his lips. “You're really smart.”

Charlie just shrugged again and said, “I gotta get home. My mom's gonna call the cops if I'm not home by it's night.”

“Yeah, okay,” Mac said. “Yeah, I'll see you tomorrow.”

“See ya,” Charlie answered, walking away. Charlie felt a little embarrassed at all of the nice stuff Mac said. Mac said nice stuff to him sometimes, but he's never been called smart by anybody but his mom. It felt so good. It was the first time he ever remembered feeling proud of himself.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope anybody from PA liked the little shout outs to Philly snacks. TastyKakes & Herr's Chips are the flavors of my childhood.
> 
> Also I'm p sure anybody that grew up in any American urban area can relate to the nostalgia associated w/ corner stores after school.


	3. Charlie Gets Mac a Dog

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mac's dad gets arrested and so Charlie gets Mac Poppins.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warnings for this chapter: any trauma associated w/ a parent getting arrested, alcoholic/neglectful Mrs. Mac, kids getting high, a quick reference of implied csa.
> 
> They're probs like 6th grade here? Maybe 5th? Just like 10-12ish?
> 
> Also I never named Poppins in this story and I'm lazy. Pretend he got named later.

Mac’s dad got arrested exactly a week ago. The whole experience was pretty traumatizing. A raid in the middle of the night woke Mac up. His dad got taken away in handcuffs, his mom drunkenly yelled at the officers, Mac watched from the steps.

Charlie found out the next morning. He came over Mac’s, like he did every morning, and everything was in disarray. Mac looked like he'd been crying (and he never cried because he was super tough!), and had clearly not slept. They ditched school to hang out by the train tracks and get high with weed they stole from Mac’s mom. Mac admitted how afraid and sad he was, Charlie listened. 

That night, and every night since, Mac slept at Charlie's house. It was easier that way. He stopped by to say hi to his mom every afternoon after school. She was too drunk, or too engrossed in her shows, or generally too unfeeling to respond with much more than grunts and nods. His mom had always been distant, but this was a new level. And it was scary for Mac. It was like he lost two parents instead of one.

Charlie loved having Mac sleep over. He would let Mac sleep over every day for a year if he could. Not only did he feel completely safe in his own room (not that there was any physical reason not to anymore, but memories can make you feel unsafe too), but it was just awesome to spend all your time with your best buddy. Still, Charlie felt bad. He remembered what it was like not to want to be at home. He hated that Mac felt that way.

So, Charlie devised a plan. Usually, Mac made the plans, but he was sure this would work. He lied and said he had detention, telling Mac to go to his own house until he got sent home. This wasn't a totally unbelievable story, Charlie was always in trouble for something.

When school got out, he waited patiently in his classroom. He watched the courtyard until it was mostly clear. When he was sure Mac was gone, he left. Action time. He had about an hour to get everything done.

First, he went to a small pet store a few blocks away from school. He looked at the dogs, but they were way too expensive. He had planned for this. At the store, he got the cheapest dog food he could find, a leash, and a collar. He also got some toys, but at the checkout counter, he had to abandon them. His snow shoveling and grass cutting money combined couldn't buy all that. He decided he and Mac could find household items to turn into toys eventually. For now, he got the essentials.

Heavy bag by his side, he started making his way towards the alleys. Walking behind the row homes of South Philly, he began searching. He knew a cat would be easier to find, but he also knew Mac liked dogs better. He always told Charlie that liking cats made him  _ girly _ . Charlie knew Mac was wrong, but this wasn't about proving Mac wrong, it was about helping Mac.

Charlie was walking for almost a half hour. It felt helpless. He passed so many cats and couldn't even pet them because he was on business. He almost decided to give up and start walking home when there was a rustling in a nearby trash can. He froze, staring at it intently. He knew it may be a cat tricking him, or a bum who was hiding.

Charlie took a few steps forward and suddenly, a mangy dog jumped out. Charlie's eyes got wide, but he stayed silent, not wanting to scare away the pup.

Charlie took a few steps forward, pulling the collar and leash out of the bag. He dropped the food on the ground and dropped to a crouch, approaching the dog slowly and gently.

“Hey pup,” Charlie whispered. The dog looked over, cocking its head. Charlie made a kissing sound like he does to greet cats and said, “C’mere, boy.”

The dog took a step forward. Charlie grinned and shuffled forward slowly. Soon, the dog was between Charlie's legs. Charlie quickly slid the collar on, although the dog tried to avoid it.

The dog was ugly. Its fur was matted and dirty, it looked like it was snarling even when it was happy, and one of its eyes was bulging out of its socket. It wasn't the best dog to give as a gift, but he thought maybe with Mac taking care of him, the dog would grow and flourish.

Charlie walked to Mac’s house. He tied the dog up in the back alley, laying some food on the ground for it to eat while Charlie talked to Mac.

Charlie knocked on the door frantically. Mac was quick to answer the door.

“You got out early,” Mac mused.

“Oh yeah, I was the only one in detention, teacher let me go home,” Charlie lied with a shrug. “C’mon, I have something to show you.”

“Yeah?” Mac asked happily, shutting the door as he followed Charlie.

“Yeah! It's in the alley!” Charlie enthused.

“Charlie, if it's some weird trash or something, I'm gonna kill you!” Mac threatened.

“No, it's a present,” Charlie promised. When they got to the corner of the street, ready to round the corner into the alley, he told Mac, “Close your eyes!”

With one hand, Mac covered his eyes. He had a bright grin on. Charlie took his free hand and led him to in front of the dog. Charlie let go of Mac's hand, but instructed him to keep his eyes closed. Charlie untied the dog and picked it up. 

“Open 'em,” Charlie said, grinning proudly.

Mac let his hand drop and looked at Charlie. His smile dropped a little as he looked between Charlie and the small dog.

“Are you mad?” Charlie asked when Mac didn't respond. “I thought maybe if you had a dog, your house would suck less. Cause like, it'd be like there was always a friend there and-” 

Mac shut Charlie up by taking the dog from Charlie's hands and saying, “This is the nicest present ever, Charlie! It's a totally kick-ass dog, he's seen some shit! I love him! Thanks, man!”

Charlie smiled shyly and shrugged, “Yeah man, I just thought it'd be cool if you had a dog.”

“It's totally cool,” Mac agreed. “And my mom's not gonna say no to shit right now, so it's perfect.”

Charlie laughed and nodded. He explained to Mac that he'd already gotten the dog some food. The two of them went into Mac's house with the dog. Mrs. Mac didn't even seem to notice the dog.

The boys quickly went to work on making dog feel at home. They used one of Mac’s old blankets to make a bed for the dog in Mac's room. They used old bowls as food and water bowls in the kitchen. They got some of Mac's childhood toys to use as dog toys. And since they were at Mac's house and not Charlie's, they didn't even have to pretend to spend any of that time doing homework.

Best of all, Mac actually seemed happy and excited for the first time in a week. Charlie was a little sad to have to sleep alone that night, but he was happy that he made Mac's house feel like a safe place for Mac again.


	4. Charlie gets detention.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Detention was the worst. It was even worse when Mac wasn't there. Usually, they got in trouble together. Well, really, one of them would get in trouble and the other would spring to action, getting themselves in trouble too.
> 
> Today he'd gotten in a lot of trouble and all by himself. He huffed a lot of glue in the bathroom before class. That was pretty normal for him. Mac didn't want to that day because of the big test they had, which is exactly why Charlie huffed more than usual. Charlie hated tests. They were just another excuse for someone to call him stupid."
> 
> \-----  
> Charlie gets into a lot of trouble b/c he calls his teacher a cunt, school makes him feel stupid, Bonnie is a disaster of a human being, Mac is a good friend. 
> 
> Idk how old they are, too young to know the word cunt for sure.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i literally never thought i was updating this again, whatever. sorry this chapter is very long but i'm not sorry. have fun!

Detention was the worst. It was even worse when Mac wasn't there. Usually, they got in trouble together. Well, really, one of them would get in trouble and the other would spring to action, getting themselves in trouble too.

Today he'd gotten in a lot of trouble and all by himself. He huffed a lot of glue in the bathroom before class. That was pretty normal for him. Mac didn't want to that day because of the big test they had, which is exactly why Charlie huffed more than usual. Charlie hated tests. They were just another excuse for someone to call him stupid.

Of course, the glue was a fleeting high. When they were taking the test, Charlie began to feel sleepy and his head hurt. He already answered all of the questions (well, he didn’t read the questions and most of his answers were drawings of cats and spiders and other cool stuff), so he laid his head down on the desk.

“Charles,” the stupid cunt of a teacher said, “You need to take your test.”

“I'm done,” Charlie mumbled, not picking his head up.

“I find that hard to believe,” she said flatly.

“I find it hard to believe you’re still talking,” Charlie mumbled. A few people stifled a laugh, including Mac. That made him feel a bit more confident, which was dangerous.

“Excuse me?” She asked. She started walking towards his desk. “Mr. Kelly, I suggest you actually finish your exam before you get yourself sent to the principal’s office.”

“I suggest you go sit back down and leave me the fuck alone you stupid fucking cunt,” Charlie said dryly. He wasn't screaming. His his head was still down. He was just tired and his head hurt, he wanted to rest.

“That's it!” She shouted. It always seemed like grown ups shouted first. “There is no reason a boy your age should even know those words, let alone use them towards your teacher! You go to the principal's right now!”

“I'm not going anywhere,” Charlie mumbled.

“Yes you are,” she said, grabbing Charlie's arm. Since his head was down, the contact surprised and scared him. His head popped up, there was a fire in his eyes.

“Get off of me!” Charlie screeched. His voice was always high pitched, but this time, it was different. It was as if the words came straight from the vocal cords from the back of his throat, as if they did not have enough time to travel up from his chest or his belly, they just came out of the first place that would let sound out. 

After that, there was a lot of screaming. A lot of blackness. A lot that Charlie didn’t remember.

He was conscious the whole time, physically, but he did not feel conscious until he was sitting in a chair in the main school office. He wasn’t sure how long he’d been waiting. The chair’s fabric was scratchy. It used to be soft, he could tell. It was a faded maroon color. He liked that color. He started to pick at the cloth at the chair almost as soon as he came back to reality. He didn’t have to think because he had something to do, something to focus on.

He had no idea how long it had been or how many times he heard his name called, but the principal was standing right in front of him, crouching down a bit, saying his name in a tone that adults used when they’ve already repeated themselves a billion times.

Charlie looked up, but didn’t say anything, fingers still playing with the cloth.

“Charlie, come on into the office,” the principal said. “Your mother is on her way, she will be here shortly.”

Charlie rose and followed the principal. He knew how and when to be obedient. He didn’t like it though. He pointedly dragged his toes on the carpet, making a quiet protest against what felt like a march to his death.

The principal sat in his seat. It was big and leather and swiveled. It was a nice seat. Charlie sat on the other side of the big brown desk. His chair did not swivel, it was not very big. It was similar to the one in the waiting room, but this one was once a deep blue. Charlie liked the maroon better. He looked down at the armrest and started to pick at the fabric of the new chair.

“Charlie,” the principal said, pointedly. The two were not strangers. Mr. O’Connor knew Charlie very well from similar visits. Mr. O’Connor was actually much nicer than most of Charlie’s teachers ever had been. Still, he was the one to punish Charlie and to tell Charlie’s mom what he did wrong, so Charlie did not like him much. “Can we talk about your outburst today?”

“What outburst?” Charlie mumbled. He knew he had an outburst. He remembered the cursing and the screaming. Still, it was nice to pretend it didn’t happen.

“In class, during your exam,” the principal said. He tilted his head down as he looked at Charlie, as if looking over a pair of glasses, but he didn’t wear glasses.

“That was a stupid test,” Charlie said with a shrug.

“It’s not the test that is my concern, although you will need to retake it if permitted by your teacher and if you are permitted to stay in the same class with her, but it is your behavior that we need to talk about.”

“I was done my test, I wanted to sleep.”

“School is not the time for sleep and you know that. We’ve been over this countless times.”

“Well if you’re done your test, you should be able to sleep,” Charlie said, his voice breathy. He was getting frustrated. Not frustrated like he wanted to scream, but frustrated like he wanted to be alone and maybe cry.

“You were not done the test. You had not answered over half of the answers. You are here to learn and we need to track your progress through tests, that’s why they’re important.”

“You just want to tell me how stupid I am!” Charlie argued. He crossed his arms defiantly and sunk back into the chair.

“Nobody thinks you’re stupid,” Mr. O’Connor said, his voice getting softer. He was lying. He knew he was lying, Charlie knew he was lying, but he still said it nicely. “And school will do nothing but make you smarter.”

“I don’t need to be smarter.” 

Mr. O’Connor looked at Charlie as if in deep thought before shaking his head dismissively, saying, “Charlie, this is not the conversation we need to be having right now. Your education is important, but we need to speak about your behavior, your outburst.”

“What? Just ‘cause I called a stupid cunt of a teacher a stupid cunt? I wasn’t lying!” Charlie defended, he sat up a little straighter. There was no laughter this time though, his bravery was falsified.

“We do not use that sort of language at school, and we do not use it against teachers and other adults we are supposed to respect, do you understand, Charlie? That is absolutely unacceptable,” Mr. O’Connor said, his voice was a little louder, but he was not screaming.

“This is so stupid! You can’t call my mom in just because I cursed.”

“You cursed at a teacher in front of the entire class and then continued to make a scene when she asked you to leave,” the principal said shortly.

“I wouldn’t have freaked out if she didn’t manhandle me,” Charlie said. He couldn’t help but smile a little bit at the phrase manhandle. Mac said it a while back and Charlie liked it, but he couldn’t figure out a good time to say it until now. And it actually worked, he thinks. He would ask Mac about it later.

“She did not  _ manhandle _ you, you would not leave the classroom. She was trying to escort you out.”

“This is so stupid,” Charlie repeated.

The principal opened his mouth to speak when there was a knock at the door. Both him and Charlie directed their attention towards the door. The secretary’s voice called out, “It’s Mrs. Kelly, sir.”

“Let her in,” Mr. O’Connor said. He cleared his throat and sat up a little straighter, as if recompossing himself to talk to a rational adult, not the emotional child he’d just been nearly arguing with.

As soon as Bonnie walked through the door, it was clear that he would not be speaking to a rational adult. He didn’t know why he was surprised. Mascara already stained her cheeks and her quick, heavy breaths filled the quiet room.

“Thank you for coming so quickly, Mrs. Kelly,” Mr. O’Connor said, although his voice was strained, he was clearly frustrated.

Charlie, however, was ashamed of his actions for the first time that day. Making a teacher angry was fine. Getting in trouble was fine. Failing his classes didn’t matter. Making his mom cry was too much though.

“Of course,” she said between gasps, like there wasn’t enough air in the room. She wiped her cheeks quickly, as if she could pretend she hadn’t even been crying and said, “I’m sorry I’m a mess. I just worry so much about my Charlie.”

“I understand,” Mr. O’Connor sighed. “You were told about today’s events over the phone, correct?”

“Yes,” she said, taking a deep breath in to calm herself. “I’m so sorry he’s been acting up, I don’t know what’s gotten into him.”

“Neither do I,” Mr. O’Connor said. He couldn’t directly tell her that Charlie had always and will always be a terror. Parents don’t take too kindly to that. “I think the best plan of action is to give Charlie some time to reflect on his behavior away from school, and maybe you and him could discuss his outburst, he isn’t giving me anything to work with. Three day suspension should do it.”

Charlie hated being talked about like he wasn’t there. He understood that they were grownups, that they were somehow more important than him, but he hated it.

“Oh no,” Mrs. Kelly said, bringing her hand to her mouth in shock. “Please, please no. He has enough suspension on his record and he gets restless at home. The structure of school is good for him. Couldn’t you possibly bring it down to detention? He didn’t hit anybody!”

“I don’t know if it’s a good idea to allow Charlie to disrespect his teacher in such a way and then allow him to continue with school like nothing happened,” the principal said, shaking his head. 

“Please, please Mr. O’Connor, school is good for him. And he’s already behind, suspending him will make it even harder for him to catch up. He won’t have an outburst like this again, I promise.  _ We  _ promise, right Charlie?” Bonnie said, looking at Charlie pointedly.

Charlie shrugged.

“Promise Charlie, please,” she pleaded.

“Fine,” Charlie mumbled, although he did not intend to keep that promise. It’s not like he meant to freak out. His teacher started it!

There was more discussion. Charlie zoned out, focusing on the string on the chair again. Then he was asked to leave the room. Then more discussion, he assumed. Eventually, Mrs. Kelly came out of the office. Her cheeks were flushed and her makeup was even more out of place, Charlie figured she had done more crying. 

Bonnie knelt in front of the chair Charlie then sat on, the maroon one. She put her hands on his shoulders and looked at his face until he looked back. When Charlie finally made eye contact, she said some words that Charlie only half-focused on. 

He mostly understood. He would stay in school. Detention for the rest of this week and all of the following. He would spend the rest of the school day that day in the office and would return to class the following day. And then some other words like respect, calm, fighting, reading. Charlie didn’t care.

At least he wouldn’t be suspended. If Mac got suspended too, it would be cool, but if not, he’d just be stuck at home alone with nothing or nobody. He didn’t like being home too much in the first place, he didn’t like the idea of spending three full days at home. School sucked, but at least he wasn’t alone.

But now he was alone. After spending all day in the office alone, he was in detention alone. Well, not completely alone. There were some older kids sitting in the back. But he kept his head down, not even wanting to look at them the wrong way, because he knew he’d either get the shit beat out of him or end up covered in their blood with a suspension note for his mom.

Charlie tried to nap, he got yelled at. He started to play drums on his desk, and he got yelled at for that. The teacher told him to read, but just the thought of looking at words during the entirety of detention made his head hurt. After what felt like about three years, the teacher at the front told them they could all go home.

And so Charlie pulled his backpack close, it was pretty much empty, but he liked to fidgit with the straps as he walked. He thought about how long the walk home would feel without Mac. Sometimes, he even got lost without Mac if he wasn’t paying enough attention to the landmarks around him. He hadn’t even gotten out of the gates of the school when a bush rustled and he was tackled to the ground.

He let out an ear-splitting screech and twisted in the arms of his attacker, ready to fight, but he immediately saw Mac’s face inches away from him and his screech turned into delighted laughter.

“Dude! You waited for me!” Charlie laughed, standing up after Mac pushed himself off of Charlie.

“Yeah, man! I saw you in the detention room when I was leaving school!” Mac said with glee, grabbing Charlie’s hand, swinging their hands happily as they walked home. One of the coolest things about detention was that there weren’t that many people close enough to school this late in the day, which meant Mac would hold his hand sometimes.

“Yeah, they said I gotta be there up til next Friday,” Charlie said with a sad sigh.

“Dude, that fucking blows! I’ll try to get detention some days too!” Mac promised. “Dude, what you did today was totally badass!”

“Really?” Charlie asked, unable to help a smile. It’s like he totally forgot the image of his mom crying in the office.

“Yeah, man! She  _ was  _ being a total cunt!” Mac shouted the last word, gleeful to be able to use such a bad word.

“Yeah, I know man! I was done my test!”

“No, you totally weren’t man, that’s why I tried to get you to study with me yesterday!”

“I did study with you!”

“No, you drew my picture while you watched me study!”

“Yeah, but I drew you as a transformer, which is pretty badass!”

“Yeah, that was pretty badass, but dude, you gotta start studying with me! And if you do some shit like that I think they’re gonna make you be in a different class, so I won’t be able to do your homework for you,” Mac explained, getting very serious. Their hands stopped swinging, Mac started to squeeze Charlie’s hand gently.

“Dude, since when do you care about stupid nerd stuff?”

“I’m just scared you’re gonna get held back and then we won’t be in school together anymore and then when I go to high school and you don’t, we won’t be friends,” Mac huffed.

“Whatever, dude! It doesn’t matter!” Charlie grumbled, tugging his hand away from Mac’s.

“Dude, I’m your best friend, I just wanna help you!”

“No, you just don’t want to leave me behind ‘cause then you won’t have any friends and you’ll be a lame loser nerd by yourself!”

“What the fuck is your problem, man?” Mac yelled back.

“I just hate school!” Charlie shouted, dramatically dropping his backpack to the ground.

“Charlie! Fuck that!” Mac yelled. “I hate school too, but c’mon man, you gotta get your shit together!”

“I can’t, Mac! I’m stupid! I’m a stupid idiot and everybody knows it! Why should I keep going to school and pretend I’m not an idiot!”

“Dude, you’re not an idiot! You’re a total genius! Like, you understand Philly’s sewer system by memory! I bet you even the mayor doesn’t know that!”

“That’s not smart, that-”

“And you know the bus schedule by heart, so you can get us anywhere we want to go all the time! And you know exactly what lies to tell adults to get what we want! And you’re the best at stealing! And you don’t have a piano at home, but you can play any song you hear at the piano at school! Like how can you even do that? Dude, you’re so smart! Just like… different smart!” Mac ranted quickly without taking a breath.

“You really think I’m smart?” Charlie asked, refusing to look up at Mac because this was so nice he might cry and crying in front of Mac over something  _ good  _ would be super embarrassing.

“Yeah, man, I swear,” Mac promised. He bent down and picked Charlie’s backpack up for him, handing it to his friend.

“C’mon, let’s go to the train tracks, it’s still kinda sunny, we can study there for a little while.”

“Okay, yeah, I guess studying at the train tracks is better than studying at home.”

“Exactly!” Mac laughed, grabbing Charlie’s hand again.


	5. Heat Waves & Getting High

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> it's too hot to sleep so mac proposes they smoke weed for the first time

It’s late at night and hot enough that Mac’s just in boxers and Charlie’s, normally layered up no matter the weather, is only wearing a tanktop and basketball shorts. They’re in Mac’s bed, but they’re not even covered up by a sheet. Mac’s old box fan clicks loudly in the corner of the room.

“I can’t sleep dude, I’m sweating,” Charlie huffed, pulling himself away from Mac to roll towards the wall, hoping it would feel cool.

“I know, man! It’s so damn hot!” Mac groaned, rolling towards the edge of his bed. He opened his drawer and started to shuffle around.

“Are you getting some glue? That’ll help us pass out,” Charlie said, sitting up slowly.

“No, man, something better,” Mac said as he made noise while he shuffled around the drawer before rolling off the bed onto his feet.

“What’d you got?” Charlie asked, following after Mac, standing up and walking towards the window.

“I stole some of my mom’s weed,” Mac said. “I was saving it for a celebration, but I bet it’ll help us fall asleep.”

“Yeah, you think?” Charlie asked, he was grinning. 

“Yeah, c’mon, let’s go out on the roof,” Mac said, already crawling out of the window.

Charlie followed Mac behind, very familiar with the route in and out of Mac’s window. 

Once they were both seated as comfortably as possible on the slanted roof, Mac lit the already rolled joint. He took in a deep breath and coughed it out immediately.

“Are you high?” Charlie asked while Mac was still coughing. “How is it?”

“Don’t be dumb, Charlie, you don’t get high that quick with weed,” Mac said, eyes tearing as he held back his next cough, handing the joint to Charlie.

“Yeah, duh, so dumb, I know that man, I been high plenty of times,” Charlie said, looking at the joint suspiciously before taking a slow drag. He held it in his chest for a moment before finally coughing, handing it back to Mac.

“Yeah, me too,” Mac agreed, “I’ve been high so many times.”

The two of them bragged back and forth about all of the times they’d been high, which was complete bullshit because the reason Mac saved this joint was because he knew it was both of their first times smoking weed. 

Eventually, the joint was burning their fingers and Mac pressed it against the shingles of the roof to put it out. Charlie was leaning back, propped up on his elbows, looking up at the dark sky above them with a wide grin.

“I think I’m high man,” Charlie laughed.

“Yeah, me too,” Mac answered, leaning back into a very similar position as Charlie.

“Is like your head kinda like-” Charlie trailed off with a whistle.

“Yeah, yeah,” Mac agreed before yawning. “We gonna try to sleep?”

“I dunno man, I’m diggin’ outside.”

“Yeah, but I could be diggin’ bed,” Mac hummed, already standing slowly. Dramatically, he held his hands out to his sides to keep his balance as he started to walk towards the window.

“Maaaaac,” Charlie whined, not sitting up any further. “C’mon, stay out here.”

“No man,” Mac said with an exaggerated whisper. “Shut up, we’re gonna get caught.”

“Then stay out here, or I’m gonna scream,” Charlie threatened with a sinister smile.

“I’ll lock my window on you,” Mac threatened.

With a loud groan, Charlie followed Mac, crawling on the roof before diving headfirst into Mac’s room, laughing as he half somersaulted. 

“You’re loud as shit man,” Mac said with a laugh, reaching down to grab Charlie’s hand to pull him up.

“Yeah, whatever,” Charlie hummed, letting go of Mac’s hand to stand up. He jumped onto Mac’s bed just as loudly. “Dude, I’m dizzy.”

“It’ll go away,” Mac promised, joining Charlie in bed, pulling Charlie to his chest comfortably, not giving a shit about the heat anymore.

“I like it,” Charlie mumbled, closing his eyes as he rested his head on Mac. “It lasts longer than glue too.”

“Yeah man, it does,” Mac spoke slowly, dragging his finger up and down Charlie’s back slowly.

“Dude, talk again,” Charlie whispered.

“Talk? Say what?” Mac asked.

“Anything,” Charlie said, smile growing. “Your chest, like it vibrates all cool, it feels funny.”

“Yeah?” Mac asked.

“Yeah, talk more though.”

“Dude, I don’t know what to say, you can’t just tell me to talk without telling me what to say.”

Charlie laughed and sat up, looking down at Mac with a smile, “Dude, how do you get your voice that deep?”

“That’s just what my voice sounds like,” Mac laughed, pulling Charlie back down to him. “C’mon, man, let’s go to sleep, that’s why we smoked in the first place.”

“Yeah, but now I’m just having a good time,” Charlie mumbled.

Mac yawned and nodded, “Yeah, yeah, me too.”

But Charlie could tell that Mac was drifting to sleep. The movements Mac’s hand had made on his back were starting to slow down. 

Charlie sighed and said, “You don’t gotta keep talking.”

“Good,” Mac said, face pressing into Charlie’s hair.

“Night bud,” Charlie whispered, closing his eyes. He wouldn’t be far behind Mac.


End file.
